Challenge for Familiarity

When I first boarded a plane I was filled with awe, excitement and appreciation. Everything from the clouds outside the window to the food amazed me. After years of flying, those feelings have changed. Now as I board a flight, familiarity has tainted my experience with cynicism and entitlement. I get annoyed when I have a middle seat or when i don’t get ice in my drink. It becomes more about my comfort than appreciating the miracle of flight. This is an example of familiarity creating walls, not freedom.

So what does that have to do with God or how we relate to Him?

As a young Christian, I have asked a lot of questions about how to have a good relationship with God. How can I be consistent when my life was constantly changing? I thought that if I could achieve a place of feeling close to God and then somehow maintain this, then I was doing things right. I thought familiarity was maturity. Eventually, holding the weight of that mindset was crushing me. God didn’t want me in a prison of familiar expectations. He wanted to set me free in a relationship where I was allowed to grow and change. From that place, I wouldn’t be filled with insecurity if God was doing something different or new. I would be at peace through change rather than feel threatened.

I had a friend tell me once that after being married to His beautiful wife for many years, it was a great adventure to get to know her more and more. Her love for God was transforming her into a new creation every day. As she grew and changed, it didn’t fill her husband with fear and insecurity, but wonder.

There was beauty in the unfamiliarity they cherished between each other. When we become familiar with something or someone, we often lose our wonder. By believing we know all there is to know, we neglect being intentional. We put that thing or person in a box of understanding, imprisoning them in our familiar expectations. 

When I first became a part of Youth With A Mission, I encountered God in a way I hadn’t before. It changed the way I saw Him and how I saw life and myself. I can remember feeling His presence and learning how to express my love for Him in a personal way. After my DTS, as I journeyed through different seasons, I experienced God differently and also I related to him differently. At first I struggled with this. I was filled with questions. Am I doing something wrong or finally doing things right? Is God less involved in my life? Is my faith finally strong enough? Regardless of the questions, Father God was doing new and beautiful things. I was growing.

The truth of God and His love remains the same, but the way it is expressed and we experience it will change. At times I have felt so close to God and so aware of His Presence. At times my faith has been rocked to the core and not only did I struggle to connect with God, but I wondered if He was even real. Finding Him in my season and really letting Him find me, even though it has been different, has been my saving grace. I found that Jesus really is our only hope.

It is the changes and the different expressions I have experienced of God that has helped me fall in love in way that is more deep and more whole. Along the way I could have decided control, safety and familiarity was better. Maybe then I wouldn’t have experiences as many low moments, but I know I definitely wouldn’t have experienced the beautiful highs either. Keeping my heart soft in the inconsistency has been the most important thing. Be familiar with the posture of pursuing more, not the maintaining what you have known.